I think my brother just cringed in Heaven at the title of this post, but I swear that this is not pervy.
A city next to mine has a requirement that all new construction must include some sort of art. As a result, all new construction has some sort of lame sculpture out front. Off the top of my head, I can think of quite a few different pieces: ballerinas, eagles, a group of kids running, abstract shapes, and some sort of free-form sculpture that looks like three turds clustered tightly together.
I have a goofy sense of humor so accept my apologies if the following doesn't tickle your funnybone.
I've told my husband for several years that it would be hilarious to attach a bright pink dildo to each sculpture. Imagine the dainty ballerinas en pointe. . .with a huge pink dong hanging out of their tutus. The eagle. . .with a fake penis hanging out of it's mouth. The kid in the rear "chasing" the other kids. . .with a dildo in his hand. I chuckle at the thought of the townsfolk being outraged - outraged - by the plethora of bright pink dildos on their lame-ass sculptures. Art is subjective, right? Who's to say that my vision isn't also art?
Why dildos? I don't know, but maybe it's because dick jokes are funny. Why bright pink? I guess because pink is my favorite color. Why do I want to molest these sculptures? I don't know, but I think it would be an epic prank.
I actually asked my husband once if we could purchase a gross of bright pink dildos to make my dream come true. He said no and added that he wouldn't want to bail me out of jail if I get caught sexually harassing the sculptures. I then inquired about purchasing just one bright pink dildo and spending the night driving around town (attaching said dildo to sculptures) and taking a photograph so I know it happened once. He looked at me like I suggested something really crazy and said he didn't think it was a good idea. Killjoy.
What silly pranks have you pulled? Were you caught? I'd love to hear about them - whether or not they involve bright pink dildos!