Under the Boardwalk

My husband was intrigued by the previews for HBOs newest show, Boardwalk Empire.  Though we usually agree on television programming, I thought it looked overdone and somewhat campy.  He persisted and I finally caved.

Thanks to OnDemand, we were able to watch all eight episodes that had already aired.  I am very glad that I decided to give it a look!  Like a gin-soaked buddy, the pilot grabbed me by the lapel, knocked the fedora off my head, and dragged me on a wild bootleggy ride. 

Here are the Bs, Bs, and Bs of Boardwalk Empire:

Boardwalk - It's about the sordid underbelly of Atlantic City.
Buscemi - I think it's an interesting casting move to put Steve Buscemi in not only a lead role, but one that is also a romantic lead.  I have to admit that he's a good choice for the role.
Booze - It's 1920 and Prohibition has recently passed, but booze is still an important character on the show. . .I might even argue that liquor is the most important character, but that's just the alcoholism talking!
Beer - Yes, beer was illegal too and green beer was already an important part of St. Patrick's Day celebrations.
Bootleggers - Prohibition's biggest fans help to keep the city nice & wet.
Bullets - The natural companion to a prohibition is crime and the bullets frequently fly.
Bodies - Don't be surprised by a sky-high body count when watching a show about gangsters.
Balls - These characters are impossibly bold:  openly drinking, moving barrels of beer in broad daylight, knocking off and rubbing out crime bosses.
Bromance - See Jimmy & Al and tell me if you agree.
Broads - The sheer quantity of Nucky's nookie illustrates that dames have always flocked to money and power over youthful looks and enthusiasm.
Boobs - I'm a little disappointed that fake tits have managed to show up in a 1920s period piece, but I suppose it's nearly impossible to find actresses without augmentation these days.  In any event, several actresses flash their boobies.
Bush - Let's just say that the Brazilian wasn't found in Atlantic City in 1920.
Butts - It may be historically accurate, but I think every character smokes cigarettes on this show.  Perhaps the children too.
Babies - Nucky clearly has a soft spot for babies and I suspect that Mrs. Schroeder's miscarriage is what primarily triggered his overly protective response.
Baseball - You've certainly heard of the Black Sox scandal and the show contains a subplot with a rival New York gangster involved in fixing the 1919 World Series.

The Roaring Twenties were certainly not boring and neither is Boardwalk Empire!

Rehab Starts Next Tuesday

I'll bet you think that this is another post where I rail against addiction and how it damages relationships, huh?  Well, it's totally not so read on and chillax.


Rehab - Party at the Hard Rock starts up again next Tuesday on truTV.  Most "reality" shows don't interest me and this is a rare exception.  This show only appeals to me because I live vicariously through the lives of the attendees, if only for an hour each week.

The show takes place at the outdoor pool of the Hard Rock in Las Vegas.  It follows the employees as they go about their work.  Some are boring (the man-hating bartenders), some are douches (the douchy manager demonstrates a special brand of douchiness), and some are interesting (usually the barbacks or the cocktail waitresses).  But the real stars of the show are the partygoers.

The chicks wear miniscule bikinis, sky-high CFM shoes, and try to look their sexiest.  The guys throw around the one thing that gets the attention of every woman.  No, not that.  Well, maybe that too.  But I initially meant money.  Lots and lots of money is necessary to do this thing the right way.

I'm a middle-aged suburban housewife.  I'm decidedly more concerned with sleep training my toddler than hooking up with strangers, but I freaking love this show!  If I were 60 pounds lighter and ten years younger (okay, okay, it's more like almost 15 at this point!), I would have been all over that party scene.  Hot people, cool drinks, and loose morals. . .ah, hedonism (and not the awesome resort) at its best! 

I can't wait for next Tuesday. . .and I hope that the kiddo goes to sleep early so I can actually watch the show!

Favorite Television Theme Songs

Whew! I am a lazy old heifer. I didn't write an blog post tonight on California politics. Instead, I'm offering much lighter fare. In no particular order, here are some instantly recognizably television theme songs that I love:


Bonanza - I LOVE BONANZA! I love, love, love it! I'm a little embarrassed to admit that even my two-year old son and my German Shepherd Dog (GSD) can recognize this theme song! The Cartwright men were always embroiled in some drama, the good guys were always honest, and justice was always served. I know that Little Joe (Michael Landon) was supposed to be the heartthrob on the show, but I personally prefer Adam (Pernell Roberts) or Pa (Lorne Greene). Even Hoss (Dan Blocker) had some appealing traits.

Gilligan's Island - I will not change the channel if The Ballad of Gilligan's Island is on the radio. I listen to Sirius and I have heard it a time or two.

The Brady Bunch - Those rascally Brady children and their unflappable housekeeper, Alice! How is it that the father was an architect and he couldn't design a house big enough for his brood?

Hawaii Five-0 - I have never watched a single episode. But I know the theme song from the first notes and I'll bet you do too!

Scooby Do - There were at least a couple of theme songs for this show, but I like both that I can recall. Looking back, I wonder if the entire crew of the Mystery Machine were totally high. Seriously, they not only thought their dog talked, but they looked to him for advice. They cruised around in their groovy duds looking for sweet gigs. At least one of them (Shaggy) would do stuff for dog snacks. And they were always seeing ghosts. It's, like, creepy, man!

Jeopardy! - Merv Griffin wrote this theme song as a lullaby for his son in about a minute. I read the other day that he has earned somewhere around $70 to $80 million dollars in royalties from this theme song alone. Having that kind of scratch sort of makes up for having the supremely crappy name "Merv."

Taxi - They were always so grubby looking, those cab drivers. I never really got the humor as a young child, but I thought this show was absolutely hilarious as a young adult.

Star Trek - I love the original Star Trek. Only Captain James T. Kirk could be so awesome as to kick ass all over the galaxy while sporting a pot-belly in his super-tight Federation-issued shirt.

The Twilight Zone - Rod Serling. Eye of the Beholder. People are Alike All Over. Monsters Are Due on Maple Street. This series was so awesome, so dark, so cynical, and the host's lungs were so filled with smoke. I love the Twilight Zone. I could watch an episode every single day and never tire of the series.

The Love Boat - I'm partial to Isaac or Gopher myself, but I guess it was the weekly guest stars who the viewership was supposed to lust over.

The Mary Tyler Moore Show - Mary Tyler Moore was so sweet and (ahem) perky, who could resist her charms? I love this show and it boasted plenty of television sweethearts besides the titular MTM: Ted Knight (Too Close for Comfort), Gavin McLeod (The Love Boat), Betty White (The Golden Girls), Ed Asner (Lou Grant), Valerie Harper (Rhoda), and Oscar-winner Cloris Leachman (Phyllis).

Hogan's Heroes - I wanted to hate this show. I really did. But it somehow made a WWII POW camp seem so hilarious and heartwarming. I'm totally not going to address Bob Crane's pervy proclivities. . .HOOOGAAAAAN!

Welcome Back Kotter - Weeeelcome back, to that same old show I laughed about. I don't know what Gabe Kaplan's done since this show, but I loved seeing the weekly exploits of Mr. Kotter and his Sweathogs. I guess the only other notable thing about this show is that it gave John Travolta his start. . .and somehow he took that to mean that he should record a music album. I do not recommend listening to said music album.

The Beverly Hillbilly's - The Clampett's. Guided by their mountain smarts, they were often wiser than those silly citified folks who had the benefit of book learnin'.

Rawhide - Rollin', rollin', rollin', keep them doggies rollin'. . .it's very recognizable, but I've never seen a single episode so I'm unable to comment on the series itself.

Bewitched - My husband tells me that he had a crush on Elizabeth Montgomery when he was a child. I don't know what to think of that, but I thought the show was okay enough to at least watch the opening credits.

I Dream of Jeannie - When JR Ewing was a young man, he had a genie named Barbara Eden under his command. Somehow he parlayed this good fortune to become an oil magnate in Dallas. ;-)

Fantasy Island - De plane, boss! De plane! Tattoo (Herve Villechaize) was kind of the star of the show, and it was typically a spooky show. But my 2nd grade self loved this show.

The Munsters - The residents of 1313 Mockingbird Lane are forever etched in my heart. They were such creeps, but they were so sweet & so cool. In his later years, Grandpa Al Lewis frequently visited the Howard Stern radio show and he was always a riot. Fred Gywnne was such a perfect Herman Munster that I'm sad to say that I imagine him as that character in every roll I've ever seen him in. Yvonne De Carlo was so lovely, the perfect Lily, and probably the reason I love both names (Yvonne and Lily) to this day.

The Addams Family - I don't like it. I realize it came out before The Munsters, but I always kinda think that The Addams Family is the Poor Man's Munsters. Sorry.

Batman - Bang! Pow! Whap! Adam West, prior to becoming a running punchline on a Seth MacFarlane television series, wore the Batsuit with campy pride. However, I have to say that the Catwoman stole the show. Thank you Julie Newmar, and posthumous thanks to Eartha Kitt, your character was so awesome that it inspired a feature film nearly forty years later. Smack!

Mission Impossible - Prior to Bono & The Edge mangling it, this theme song was totally bitchin'. Not that they totally ruined it, but they inserted themselves in the song altogether too much. Uh, other than the totally bitchin' theme song, I know absolutely nothing about this show.

The Andy Griffith Show - Very recognizable, even if you don't know Barney Fife, Opie, or Aunt Bea. Too bad I can't whistle. . .


So what have I missed? What are your favorite theme songs from television shows? I look forward to hearing your suggestions! :-)