Relax, Prudence, this isn't a post about a certain game show host's favorite euphemism for doing it.
While hunting for party supplies and goodie bag filler, I came across a Whoopie Cushion. Thinking of all the fun times I've had with Whoopie Cushions, I immediately started cackling and grabbed one for my son. The cashier smirked at me when she rang up my purchase.
I explained, "It's for my son."
"Uh-huh." She already wasn't buying my line and raised a skeptical eyebrow in my direction when she started scanning the crayons, stickers, and number 3 candle.
"No, really, it's for my little boy."
She forced an uncomfortable smile and said, "Right."
Okay, okay, so I think toots are hilarious and Whoopie Cushions are one of the most fun inventions ever. So sue me! Eh, whatever. I paid and hustled home because I had some serious pranks to pull.
I got home and excitedly shared my purchase with my husband. I told him that I thought it would be epic to hide it and get our son to sit on it. The lil' guy was righteously nicknamed King Toot when he was only a couple of weeks old and he seriously delights in making his toots.
I readied the Whoopie Cushion and hid it under a blanket on one of the two chairs that are currently in my living room. As a side note, I really freaking hate selling & buying real estate and I'm totally over this whole moving thing. Anyway, the trap was set and I just needed to get the kiddo to sit on the chair.
I asked him to come to the living room and to take a seat. He sat on my ottoman. I kept my cool and requested that he sit on the big chair. He climbed up and plopped down and
The look on his face was priceless! His jaw dropped and his eyes were wide as he looked around at us. I was laughing so hard that I nearly peed myself as I wrestled the Whoopie Cushion out from under him. He realized that it was a joke and he started laughing too.
Now he is obsessed with blowing up the Whoopie Cushion and stomping on it while yelling, "Toot!" Every so often he adds, "Oh, excuse me," after stepping on it. I think it's the best impulse purchase that I've ever made.
I'm either a shoo-in for Mother of the Year or I'm officially out of the running!