Friday, December 10, 2010

I'm Really Starting to Hate Cats

I'm really starting to hate cats.  Before you crazed cat-lovers start freaking out over how I feel about felines, let me explain.

I have a German Shepherd Dog (GSD) who hates nearly every other animal on the planet.  His lethal jaws have snuffed the life out of a variety of animals who have had the poor sense to hang out in our yard.  Fruit rats, opossums, and birds really stand no chance when he's going for the kill.  And if you're an animal in his yard, you are considered fair game.

Neighborhood cats have been pushing their luck lately by testing this dog's speed and agility.  For months, a black cat has been hanging out in the empty lot on the other side of our back fence.  This absolutely torments our dog.  The fence is plenty short enough for the dog to jump, but I'm thankful that he doesn't realize this fact or I'm pretty sure that this particular cat would have been dead meat a long time ago.  Since the dog doesn't pop over into the empty lot, he makes sure that the cat understands the way things are in the only way he can:  he barks at the cat.  It appears that this cat doesn't speak Canine and it still hasn't got the message to beat it. 

I can understand the appeal of this empty lot to a cat.  It's a wide open space and there are tons of fruit trees around so that means there are plenty of hunting opportunities - as my dog's victims could attest.  But I freaking hate this cat.  I don't care that it hangs out behind my backyard, I hate that it's very presence sets my dog off on a barking fit.  Considering that this cat is obviously an outdoor cat (possibly an indoor/outdoor), I'm counting down the days until a car or coyote makes it disappear for good. . .good riddance.

The boldness of a cat never fails to surprise and this morning there were two cats not only near our house, but in our yard.  In our yard.  The yard that we put the dog in every morning.  Can you see where this is going?

Well, those rotten little pussies owe their very lives to my husband's quick reflexes and strong arms.  Yes, he somehow grabbed the dog and held him back.  I should mention that the cats didn't even bail right away; what freaking defiance!  I'd have let the dog enjoy a well-earned trophy and send a message to all other feline interlopers. 

Is that wrong?  You know what?  Screw 'em!  They shouldn't be in my yard and they wouldn't be running loose in the neighborhood if they were a truly loved pet.  It's just asking for a car to hurt or kill your cat, let alone the risk of injury or death from coyotes or domestic dogs.

Okay, so local cats love to give my GSD a hard time.  That's not reason to detest them, not much of a reason anyway.  No, I'm really starting to hate cats because each and every time my dog starts talking trash to cats, it freaks out my son.  The ruckus this morning not only woke the poor lil' guy out of a sound sleep, but it left him hysterically crying.  I don't blame my dog for barking, I blame the cats for teasing him.

I did find it interesting that my son was crying about ghosts when I tried to soothe him back to sleep.  Ghosts?  How in the world does he even know what that means and why in the world would he be afraid of something that doesn't exist?  Weird.

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