Thursday, March 25, 2010

Diva Cup - Month Three

WARNING - WARNING - WARNING: This is yet another post about my vagina and it's on-going adventures with a Diva Cup. Stop reading if it will creep you out to read about my period and stuff like that.

It's been three cycles with the Diva Cup. I initially thought it was the worst invention in history, far worse than a Chia Pet, but I'm definitely coming around. I guess you can say that I have a love/hate relationship with the Diva Cup. I love it most of the time and I absolutely detest it some of the time.

Let's start with fit since that is what has caused me the most problems. I still think it's too big, but I've learned to deal with it. If I relax and bear down (does that make sense?) during removal, I have a much easier time and it isn't nearly as painful. Insertion isn't usually too bad if I fold it as small as possible and lift my leg as high as possible. Yes, it does look like I'm doing bizarre yoga poses when I'm inserting my Cup.

I made the mistake of telling my husband that the Diva Cup would be perfect if I could just stretch out my vagina a tiny bit. Heh, tiny bit! Anyway, I don't mean that I want it as wide as the Midtown tunnel, but insertion and removal would be so much easier if my nether regions were just a little more roomy. My husband shot me an incredulous look and sarcastically said, "Oh yeah, that's a great idea!"

Of course, this is the guy who half-heartedly suggested that I consider having another C-section once I have our second child. You know, so that the playpen isn't destroyed by our child's melon head and broad shoulders. Honestly, that is a concern I have too, but that's another topic for another day.

So, for the most part, I have insertion and removal down. I haven't had too much trouble emptying or cleaning the Cup. Storing the Cup is easy enough. Not having to buy tampons is wonderful. In two more months the Cup will have paid for itself in tampon savings. However, I have been using a liner each day that my Aunt is visiting. I have one very heavy flow day each cycle (I fill the cup several times in a twelve hour period - hehe, period!) and sometimes the liners are necessary.

My biggest problem at this point is my morning routine. I have a tiney vaginey and it gets very irritated at intruders in the morning. The Diva Cup doesn't even try to make out for a little bit before barging on in and my vadge particularly despises the Cup in the morning. It gets so angry and clenches up so tight that, I swear, it can turn coal into diamonds.

Obviously, I have grown to hate the Cup every morning. But the rest of the day typically makes up for it. Like I said, it's a love/hate relationship.

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